The Iraq Foundation for Freedom and Democracy(IFFFAD) recently arranged for Iraqi and U.S. Congressmen and women to switch places, spending their summer recess in their counterpart's capitol. Actually, the U.S. didn't send any women to Baghdad because it is too dangerous. Iraq didn't send any women to the U.S. to protest the U.S. posiiton that Baghdad is dangerous. Senator Ted Stevens, who is being investigated by the FBI, led the American delegation. Ahem Ahem Marlarky, who is under a death threat for shaving his beard, led the Iraqi delegation.
As soon as the U.S. delegation arrived they walked around the Green Zone, taking photos with military personnel. Stevens got a lot of questions from the local media about his "Bridge to Nowhere." Iraqis wondered why he would bother to fund a bridge when he could just steal the money. Stevens proclaimed his innocense, complained about the excessive heat, and left on a military plane for Cannes.
Marlarky, sporting an inch of stubble, was asked whether he was caving in to the insurgents and growing his beard back. He claimed he was growing a beard to protest the American military surge in Iraq. Malarky had heard that what American politicans spent most of their time taking money from lobbyists, so he scheduled forty meeting with major lobbyists in Washington. He stroked his beard, talked about the weather then put out his hand. When nothing crossed his palm he decided to sell the city of Basra to lobbyists with oil connections for $10 millions dollars. To help him manage his finances Malarky hired a financial advisor who suggested he funnel the money through a front organization called Christians for the New Right. "But I'm a Muslim," he protested.
He protested all the way to Cannes where he met Senator Stevens who sold to him for $5 million a true American landscape, the Brooklyn Bridge. Fearful that he was buying a bridge to nowhere Malarky insisted on proof. Stevens showed him a photo of Walt Whitman, the American poet who lived in Brooklyn. The senator winked and Malarky put on a dress and chanted verse from Rumi.
Everyone went home happy.Posted by Chuck at August 8, 2007 03:31 PM | TrackBack